Many people I come across have suffered the painful abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers . Narcissitic mothers teach their children that love is not unconditional, that it is given only when they behave in accordance with maternal expectations. As adults these children can have difficulty overcoming feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, emotional emptiness and sadness. A great book to read if you would like to know more is 'ill I ever Be Good Enough ?' by Karyl Mcbride.